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Why Cloud Chasers are the Biggest Pieces Of Shit in the Known Universe

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They’re obnoxious and give people a bad impression of vaping

If you’re an OVE, you might not be aware that most people aren’t thinking about vaping 24/7. Some people might live in the middle of fucking nowhere and might not have even seen a vape before. So when you decide to “stealth vape” and blow a “sikk cloud” in a fucking grocery store and other people are forced to inhale your second-hand vapor (yes, retards, this is a thing), it’s going to make people angry. These people will then go on to support vaping bans and restrictions, as well as discourage other people from vaping. This is bad for the vaping movement, and the last thing we need is negatively influence public perception even more by blowing ginormous clouds in people’s faces.

They occasionally blow things up

Look, most of us know that battery safety isn’t terribly complicated. And for a normal person, it’s not. But let’s be honest here: most sub-ohm “sikk cloudz” kids are not the sharpest crayons in the box. They tend to fall into the flat-brimmed-ball-cap-with-sticker-still-attached-and-wallet-chain-on-cargo-shorts crowd and think that blowing clouds would look “tight” (retard to normal person translation: “tight” means cool. I think). They simply don’t have the required brain power to spend <10 minutes on the internet researching safety. They might also be worried about losing “street cred” if they appear to be too concerned about safety. So that’s why we get news stories about dumbasses blowing themselves up and setting things on fire. Which kind of ties in with my first point about giving people a bad impression of vaping. (“What!? These thing explode!? Let’s ban ‘em!)

They are too stupid to care about the politics of vaping

True story: Back in June of last year I went to the vape summit at the Hard Rock in Las Vegas. There was a particularly cringe-worthy portion of the event where a bunch of hot chicks were on stage throwing out bottles of juice and at one point, even giving away mods to people who could blow the biggest cloud. I saw several people literally sprint desperately from the back of the room to get close to the stage. The culmination of this pathetic vapetard moment consisted of the guy with the microphone telling the whole crowd to blow the biggest cloud they could so he could put it on Instagram. A couple hundred douchebags blowing a cloud at the exact. same. time. After seeing this one huge, obnoxious cloud blow up from the crowd I thought that I couldn’t cringe harder. I was proven wrong when I saw these cloud-chasing beta morons pathetically scrambling to take pictures with the aforementioned hot chicks (why?) who were presumably models and couldn’t give a shit less about vaping.

Immediately after this a speaker from CASAA took the stage and gave a great speech about how important it is to protect our rights as vapers. The huge mass of people who were scrambling to get free vape swag, blow clouds, and take pictures of hot chicks for some inexplicable reason? Gone. Just me and two other people who actually gave a shit.

TLDR

In conclusion, cloud chasers are a combination of the all of the personality traits that most people hate all wrapped up in one douchebag. They obnoxiously blow clouds in public, indoors. They blow themselves up with mech mods and set things on fire, which causes risk to other people, because they are literally too dumb to read about battery safety. They are too stupid and selfish to care about protecting vaping from regulations. And most importantly, they look like fucking retards.

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About J.R. Reynoldson

J.R. Reynoldson
VaporVanity co-founder J.R. Reynoldson spends 364 days per year wishing that it was 4/20. He is easily offended by your comments.

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